[MWS] Neville Longbottom - the So-Called Innocent Bystander

The Many Woes of Ronald Weasley series

Part 3 | Neville Longbottom - the So-Called Innocent Bystander



He never seemed like an important person to most people. He was, somewhat a plain guy. Okay, correction: a plain, clumsy guy. He did everything wrong usually and was unusually shy. He was the innocent looking one out of all my friends. I don't believe that for one bloody second! He's really the serpent beneath the innocent flower. See, I am smart! I threw in a para-quoted quote from The Beatles! Although Hermione keeps saying how its "paraphrasing" and how it's a quote by "William Shakespeare" .. Yeah, right! She's just trying to dumb me down again. What kind of outdated, uncommon name is William? Even though mum did name Bill that.

But back to him. Back to Neville Franklin Longbottom. He was always on the side-lines just being the doormat he is (I've told him several times to stop lying beside the Portrait Hole) UNTIL our Fifth Year! You see, everyone THOUGHT Neville was weak, but he isn't. Oh no, no, no! He's quite strong actually. He even got some bloody spot light in our Fifth Year. And I am NOT being jealous!

But what people don't understand is that Neville got into the spot light Fifth Year because of me. Yup, because of me! See, Miss Rowling told the story wrong! All wrong! She was influenced by Harry, that one. I'll tell you what really happened in the Department of Mysteries-



I was beating off Death Eater after Death Eater with spell after spell, hex after hex, jinx after jinx, shoe after shoe when I finally got all of them. I ran towards the door of the room I was in. The room was odd, it had several brains all around! I wanted to get out of there - fast! So I ran towards the door but it seemed to keep on getting farther and farther. Feeling desperate, I Accio-ed the door to me and it came! But before I could reach for the door handle, my hand was slapped away. Looking to the perpetrator, I found myself looking into the eyes of the one and only, Neville Franklin Longbottom.

"Neville? What are you doing mate!? I need to - WE need to get out of here! We need to help Harry!" I reminded in an annoyed tone,

"No Ron, I need to help Harry. You, on the other hand need to stay behind," He said in a voice unlike his usual voice.

"What do you mean Neville!?" I cried as I began to walk backwards as he began to advance on me. I pointed my wand at him, "What are you doing Neville!?"

He pointed his wand back at me and grinned menacingly at me, "It's time that you step down Ron. It's time you get yours."

"WHAT!?" I yelled, "If- if you AK me Neville they'll know! They know you're here with me!"

"I'll say Death Eaters did it!" Neville explained coolly,

"You're mad Neville! You've gone mad! Now- now let's just calm down for a moment before we - Expelliarmus!" I cried,

Neville dodged it quickly, "Accio wand!" Before I could do anything, my wand left my hand and landed in Neville's.

"Neville, c'mon.. We're friends mate! We're roommates, mate! Mate!? What are you doing mate!?" I shrieked as he advanced on me until I felt my back against the stone wall, "Mate, c'mon, you can't be serious mate!"

"I'll spare your life for now Ronald Bilius Weasley- but if you tell anyone, I WILL get you. You can be sure of that," Neville threatened before pocketing my wand and walking away.

Before he left, he turned around and smirked at me. He muttered an incantation and charmed the brains to attack me-



Neville's crazy! What did I tell you! He's CRAZY! Absolutely, downright insane that one is! Did you see how he said I'll get mine!? My what!? He was so cruel he didn't even say my what! And at the last minute, he smirked. SMIRKED! That alone proves how he's out to get me! He SMIRKED! Not a normal smirk. Oh no, no, no- this was the smirk. This was the "Draco Malfoy-Smirk". Oh yeah, I can recognize it for miles and miles! Except Neville's teeth aren't nearly as sparkly as Draco Malfoy's- don't even know how I bloody know that-

Anyway, that wasn't the only thing. Neville's horrible -- at least how he leads us on -- at practically everything- Everything BESIDES Herbology! Now- what kind of insane subject is that? Herbology- it has NOTHING to do with cooking! I haven't even once seen Professor Sprout break out any spices! No cinnamon or basil or (my personal favourite spice) Posh.

He practically shines in that class! And it has nothing to do with the fact that he always stands beside the only open window in the greenhouse. I mean, he spends his time with all those plants, flowers and weeds. THAT MUST BE IT! The weeds- I heard from Dean that some muggles burn weeds and inhale its smoke! I wonder what the point of it is, but perhaps that's why Neville's always in the greenhouses! Come to think of it, he WAS conveniently around when there was that greenhouse fire the other week!
Perhaps that's also what makes him so- different. So- shifty. So- deceiving, conniving and an evil genius! Yes, an evil genius! Only an evil genius could do what he does. And that's feed the Mandrakes every morning and evening. Yup. Evil.

Okay, okay- I know what you lot are thinking about now. "Neville's not evil" and "He's not out to get you"- But that's because you lot have been reading the TRUE story all wrong! No, that was the side of the story you got from HARRY'S (who - let us not forget - is still out to get me!) point of view. Now, he does like chocolate pudding occasionally, so that alone could pin him for being evil but he certainly doesn't live in the library, so I suppose that points him in the other direction- but Merlin, he's into Herbology! I mean, there are a lot of evil fauna out there! (Although Hermione says it's really flora.. Yeah right Mione.) He almost excels in Herbology more than Hermione! Who's ALSO evil!! And guess who else excels in Herbology that is the most evilest person in the Hogwarts!? Draco Malfoy. Yup. He's almost as good as Hermione as well! He just acts like he doesn't give a flying butterfly about Herbology, but in reality he's one of the top in the class! So you see, he's not so innocent. I can prove it just by the proof that he's good in Herbology.



(Part 4: Seamus Finnigan - the Explosives Expert)